Social media platforms like Facebook, X (Twitter) and Instagram can be a great way to keep tabs on friends and share what’s going on in your life. Examples include the kids’ milestone events, job changes, celebrations, funny pictures of the cat, and comments on current events. People have different thresholds over how much they share or the type of content, perhaps not discussing their children or sharing pictures of them. Others have fewer boundaries, possibly trying to elicit responses and reposts, and generally drive online conversation.
Examples of mistakes
Filing for divorce can be a time of upheaval, stress or loneliness that can prompt people to turn to their online community for support. It can be a huge mistake. Your spouse’s legal team searches social media platforms, seeking ways to gain negotiation leverage. Examples of what they look for include:
- Venting about it: Airing grievances can feel cathartic, but it will likely cause the other side to use it as a picture of instability, poor character or questionable credibility in recalling details about the marriage.
- Girls’ night out: Boozy affairs with the girls could lead the spouse’s team to question your responsible judgment, parenting skills or mental health (addiction).
- Big trips: Expensive trips with the kids or friends could raise questions about finances, the fair division of assets, and whether there are hidden assets or money is recklessly spent.
- Moments of doubt: Those fearing they suffer from depression, alcoholism, drug addiction or other mental health issues should immediately seek professional help instead of voicing a cry for help.
- Dating: It may seem funny to post about “getting back out there,” or you may be excited about a new friend, but this can cause unnecessary harm, or it can be a character issue when dad or mom bring strangers into a family unit in turmoil.
When in doubt, leave it out
Divorce attorneys will generally encourage clients to refrain from posting online. It’s important to remember that once you post something on the web, people can find it even when it is later deleted. If the client feels they must do it for professional reasons or to maintain a specific profile, it is best to crank up the privacy settings so the posts are not public-facing. Once the divorce is final, there is much less risk of additional damage.